Grief is one of the most personal, complex, and challenging experiences we face in life. When someone we love passes away, it can feel as though our world has been turned upside down. While there is no right or wrong way to grieve, understanding the stages of grief can help us make sense of our emotions and reassure us that what we’re feeling is part of a natural process.
The Five Common Stages of Grief
Originally introduced by psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, the five stages of grief offer a helpful framework for understanding how people commonly process loss. It’s important to remember that not everyone goes through all five stages, nor do they necessarily occur in a linear order. Each person’s grief journey is unique.
Denial
The first reaction to loss is often denial. This stage serves as an emotional buffer, helping us to survive the initial shock. Thoughts like “This can’t be happening” or feeling numb are common. Denial helps slow down the grieving process, allowing us to gradually process reality.
Anger
As denial begins to fade, pain emerges, often redirected as anger. This anger may be aimed at other people, the person who passed away, or even at oneself. While it can feel overwhelming, anger is a natural part of the healing journey. It’s a sign that we are beginning to confront our loss.
Bargaining
During this stage, we may find ourselves dwelling on “what if” or “if only” scenarios. Bargaining often reflects a desire to regain control or to undo the reality of the loss. It can also include guilt, where we question what we could have done differently.
Depression
This is a quieter stage of grief, where feelings of sadness, emptiness, and despair become more pronounced. It can be a sign that we are fully acknowledging the extent of the loss. While deeply painful, this stage is also an important part of coming to terms with what has happened.
Acceptance
Reaching acceptance doesn’t mean that everything is “okay” or that we no longer feel the pain of our loss. Instead, it means we’ve come to a place where we acknowledge the reality of the situation and begin to adjust to life without the person we’ve lost. It may involve new routines, new roles, and gradual emotional healing.
Supporting Yourself and Others Through Grief
Grieving is not something you need to do alone. Support from family, friends, and professionals can make a significant difference. Sharing memories, attending support groups, or simply spending quiet time in a peaceful space can all be helpful ways to navigate this journey. Spending time at a meaningful location like Bunurong cemetery can also offer a sense of connection and solace. Many people find comfort in visiting memorial parks or gardens where they can reflect, remember, and begin to heal.
Grief may feel overwhelming, but it is also a testament to the love and connection we shared
Understanding the stages of grief can help you recognise your feelings, find support, and begin to move forward at your own pace. There is no timetable, no “normal” way to grieve — only your way. Be gentle with yourself, seek support when needed, and know that healing is possible.
